John and Mary
aged 49 and 37
JOHN AND MARY are a couple who understand that children need a loving, stable and consistent environment to grow and develop in. John and Mary knew each other as young people through their families, and they married in October 2005, with Mary coming to the UK as John's wife in April 2006. Their relationship has grown out of mutual respect and commitment to each other, as well as their Christian values, which underpin their everyday life.
John and Mary enjoy spending time together and plan their working hours to maximise the time they can spend with each other. They like cooking traditional Ghanian meals and entertaining friends. They also enjoy foreign travel, and recently visited John’s sister, who lives in France.
John and Mary live in a three-bedroomed terraced house in a multicultural area with a vibrant Ghanaian community. They have the space to foster up to two children. John and Mary have access to local schools, leisure facilities, a GP surgery and dentists. They also have a variety of friends from church and who also provide foster care, all of whom form their support network.
John and Mary do not have any birth children of their own, though John has a daughter, aged 15, from his first marriage. John's parenting experience was gained through bringing up his daughter. His daughter lives in London with his first wife. Mary has childcare experience from her voluntary role at an orphanage in Ghana. She was able to give love and nurturing, instill positive values, and take on practical tasks that are associated with the fostering role. Mary comes from a warm and loving family and is familiar with living in a large household. She enjoys having lots of people around her and misses the children at the orphanage. Mary is looking forward to having foster children living with them as she thinks it will create a much livelier household with new challenges to face.
John's birth mother died when he was very young. He was sent to live with his father's extended family and experienced an unhappy childhood until adopted by his paternal aunt. John's childhood experiences should enhance his ability to care for children who may have experienced loss and bereavement, as well as feelings of rejection and isolation.
Both John and Mary work as care assistants. They work opposite shifts, and Mary works part time. Their roles as care assistants have given them some of the skills associated with being foster carers, such as dealing with vulnerable adults who have special needs. Although John and Mary hope to continue working part time once matched with a child, they would be prepared to give up their jobs if it this situation was likely to compromise their ability to foster children.
John and Mary's group training sessions have also enabled them to more fully understand why children are fostered. As this will be their first experience of fostering, they say that they do not currently feel equipped to care for children with severe medical conditions, learning or physical disabilities. John and Mary would prefer to foster Ghanaian children as they would feel more able to identify with their cultural needs. However, they would consider fostering children from other black and minority ethnic groups, as well as children of white ethnicity.
John and Mary do not believe in punishing children, but believe in encouraging good behaviour through positive attention and rewards. With regard to managing challenging behaviour, John feels that it is important to talk through inappropriate behaviour in ways that children will understand, and seek alternative ways of modifying and diverting such behaviour.
Ethnic and cultural descent: black African (Ghanaian)
Approval status: approved as permanent foster carers for up to two children of either gender, aged up to 17 years, and preferably of black Ghanaian ethnicity
Area: south-east England
For more information about this family, please email us and we will forward on your details to their social worker.
Last updated: 03 December 08
